9. Rescue

BBC SOUNDS STING

 

RECAP FROM LAST WEEK’S EPISODE…

 

FX: CHAIR SMASHING WINDOW

 

REQUIEM

I’ll admit that the drop is severe, but if you want to escape then you’re going to have to trust me with your lives.

 

SHAWNA

Trust you?  We still can’t even see your face!

 

REQUIEM

I have my reasons for this veil. Your kind tend to recoil from my visage.

 

CLEO

Who the hell are you?

 

REQUIEM WHIPS OFF THE VEIL. SHAWNA AND CLEO GASP

 

VASTRA

My name is Madame Vastra

 

CLEO

That is a green face!

 

VASTRA

Astutely observed. The world is much bigger than your tiny mammalian brain has ever imagined. Now JUMP!

 

Piano tune plays as credits are read.

 

DOCTOR WHO REDACTED: EPISODE NINE,

By David K. Barnes

 

SCENE 1

EXT. POWELL ESTATE, TOP OF A BUILDING - EVENING

 

Powerful electronic bass plays throughout this scene as they make their escape. Loud bangs are intermittently heard throughout.

                         

CLEO

Did you just tell me to JUMP out of a tenth storey window? Sorry spiderman, I don’t have a death wish.

 

FX. GHOST HURRICANE

 

VASTRA

USE THIS LADDER!

 

FX. VASTRA TOSSES THEM A LADDER

                     

CLEO

I’m sorry?!

                     

SHAWNA

Cleo come on!!

                     

CLEO

WHAT is happening right now?

 

FX. VASTRA FIGHTING GHOSTS. WHIZZES, POPS, BANGS, STATIC ROAR.

 

SHAWNA

It’s this or them! Alright, this should hold us. Let’s go!

 

FX. SHAWNA CLAMBERING OUT OF THE WINDOW

                     

CLEO

                    I’m gonna die

 

FX. RELCUTANTLY CLEO FOLLOWS, SLOWLY

                     

VASTRA

(Distracted by ghostbusting)

I urge you to use HASTE Miss Proctor!

 

FX. GHOSTS GETTING CLOSER

 

CLEO

Why me?

 

FX. WIND BLOWING, DISTANT TRAFFIC

 

FX. SHAWNA CLIMBING DOWN A LADDER. LOTS OF EFFORT. 

SHAWNA

(climbing, calls up) Cleo! Are you alright up there?

 

CLEO

(calls down to her)

I’m trying not to look down!

 

SHAWNA

(climbing calls up)

We’re nearly at the ground! Just don’t let go of the ladder!

 

CLEO

(calls down, sarcastic) Oh thank you! I never have thought of that!

 

FX. SHAWNA JUMPS OFF LADDER.

 

SHAWNA

(lands)

There! OK. Now you!

 

CLEO

(off)

Hold up a minute! This is harder than it looks!

 

SHAWNA

Didn’t you do your Duke of Edinburgh?

 

CLEO

(off)

Not in a skirt, I didn’t!

 

FX. CLEO JUMPS, LANDS.

 

CLEO

What about whatsername - Vastra?

 

FX. VASTRA LANDS HEAVILY BUT EXPERTLY NEXT TO THEM, HAVING JUMPED FROM THE WINDOW.

 

VASTRA

(Jumps)

Tally ho!

 

SHAWNA

(yell of surprise)

 

FX: Vastra lands.

 

CLEO

Oh my god.

 

VASTRA

You called?

 

FX. SHE STANDS, DUSTING HERSELF OFF.

 

CLEO

Did... did you just jump from a tenth storey window?

  

VASTRA

(matter of fact)

Yes.

SHAWNA

But that’s amazing.

 

VASTRA

I know. Shall we go?

 

FX. SHE BEGINS TO WALK AWAY.

 

CLEO

Wait! Where are you taking us? Why did you make The Requiem Group?

Where did all the other people go?

 

SHAWNA

Never mind that! She’s a freakin’ DINOSAUR.

 

CLEO

Oh my god. Dinosaur people

 

SHAWNA

Episode 4 of the podcast. Abby will never let us hear the end of this.

 

CLEO (CONT’D)

(To Vastra)

What’s your deal? You’re clearly not a therapist.

VASTRA

I cannot abide unnecessary exposition.

 

FX. GHOSTLY MURMURING FROM NOT FAR OFF.

 

VASTRA (CONT'D)

Also: ghosts.

 

CLEO

Oh god.

VASTRA

We must leave, now!

 

FX. GHOSTS GETTING LOUDER

 

CLEO

You’d better have a plan, Vastra.

 

VASTRA

Yes. Run.

 

FX. THEY ALL RUN, AS THE TERRIFYING, DISTRESSING GHOST MURMURING FILLS OUR EARS. THE BASS BUILDS INTO THE NEXT SCENE.

 

SCENE 2

EXT. STREETS EVENING 

 

FX. SOME PEDESTRIANS AND CARS. OUR HEROES RUNNING, UNDER:

 

SHAWNA

So where are we heading?

 

VASTRA

A safe place.

 

CLEO

Oh great. Definitely not a murder bunker then.

 

FX. CLEO’S PHONE RINGS.

 

SHAWNA

Who’s that?

 

CLEO

It’s Abz. Should I answer?

Shawna hesitates.

SHAWNA

Yeah go on. Do it.

  

SCENE 3

INT. UNIT HQ

FX. ABBY CALLING FROM UNIT HQ. ACTIVITY IN BACKGROUND: SOLDIERS MOVING OUT, BARKED ORDERS, GENERAL FRANTIC HUBBUB.

 

ABBY

Cleo, I’ve got so much to tell you - and Shawna. So first of all, there’s ghosts.

You need to be careful – look out for

anyone who’s sort of see-through.

 

FX. WE CAN HEAR CLEO RUNNING UNDER HER VOICE.

 

CLEO

(phone)

Yeah, I know. We’ve figured out a lot without UNIT. Now listen -

 

ABBY

Cleo, please! They’re appearing everywhere, reports all over the country. UNIT says it’s classified but I had to tell you guys -

 

CLEO

(on phone)

Better late than never but-

 

ABBY

And you can’t let them touch you! Whatever you do, stay away from them!

 

CLEO

(on phone)

Girl, we KNOW! Not going to lie, I really thought you’d have a bit more helpful information for us.

 

ABBY

What?

CAPTAIN

(OFF)

Miss MacPhail!

 

ABBY

Urgh...

(CALLS OFF)

I’m on the phone!

 

CAPTAIN

(OFF)

We’re moving out - including you!

 

ABBY

Oh for... yes I’m coming!

 

FX: ABBY WALKING QUICKLY DOWN CORRIDORS.

 

CLEO

(on phone)

Abby? Where are you?

 

ABBY

... I’m still at UNIT.

 

FX: ABBY PUSHES OPEN DOOR. SHE’S NOW WALKING OUT INTO THE COURTYARD ACROSS GRAVEL. BACKGROUND TROOP ACTIVITY.

ABBY (CONT'D)

Mate, things are getting really weird around here. Like, this isn’t what I expected when we started a podcast, you know what I mean-?


 

SCENE 4

EXT. STREETS - EVENING

 

FX. CLEO SLOWING TO A STOP.

 

VASTRA

We must keep moving.

 

CLEO

It’s not exactly been a holiday for me and Shawna since you left.

(sighs)

We went back to the flat I grew up in. My mum -

 

CAPTAIN

(phone, off) MacPhail!

 

ABBY

(phone, yells) I said I’m coming!

(on phone)

Sorry, sorry. What happened at the flat?

 

CLEO

Abby. We really need your help right now...

 

CAPTAIN

(phone, off)

MacPhail! For the last time-!

 

THE LINE GOES DEAD.

 

Downbeat music begins to play as the girls realise Abby isn’t there for them.

 

CLEO

Abby? The line’s dead.

 

SHAWNA

Well. I guess there’s our answer.

 

CLEO

(crushed) Yeah. Guess it is.

 

VASTRA

I must insist we proceed at once. Follow me.

 

CLEO

No! You want a safe place to talk? Then you follow me.

 

Music builds then fades into:

 

SCENE 5

EXT. CLEO’S FLAT - EVENING

FX. CLEO SLAMS DOOR.

 

VASTRA

This is a fool’s errand - there are no answers here.

 

FX: CLEO LOCKS THE DOOR.

 

VASTRA (CONT'D)

Furthermore, those locks are

useless against them.

CLEO

Yeah all right, calm down Medusa.

 

SHAWNA

Cleo! Rude!

 

VASTRA

I’m quite used to homosapiens

reacting to my face with alarm.

The stares, the whispers. Hence

the veil.

 

CLEO

No sorry. That was rude. I know what that’s like. I should know better. I’m sorry, I mean it.

 

VASTRA

I accept your apology. Now, I’d be grateful if we left this unsecured environment.

 

CLEO

Wait, let me leave a message for Jordan.

 

FX. CLEO CLATTERING ABOUT FOR PEN AND PAPER

 

VASTRA

Who is Jordan?

 

SHAWNA

Her brother. He’s missing.

 

VASTRA

Then this is a fruitless exercise. Your brother is not here; we must proceed with all haste.

 

CLEO

Yeah, well, call me crazy. But if the world is ending then I need my little brother to know where I am.

 

FX. CLEO PHONE NOTIFICATION.

 

VASTRA

(annoyed)

Do not answer that.

CLEO

It could be Abby.

 

SHAWNA

Block her ass.

      

MONICA

(phone)

You are coming home at some point,

aren’t you? You’re not going to be staying out all day?

 

CLEO

More ghosts.

 

SHAWNA

I don’t get it. Where are they coming from?

 

VASTRA

Look outside...

Shawna crosses to the window, pulls back the curtain.

 

SHAWNA

... Oh no. No, this is bad... There’s so many of them.

VASTRA

(worried)

Most of the city has now crossed over. At this rate, the last of us will be overwhelmed...

 

Slow, sad music plays faintly in the background.

 

SHAWNA

They’re just sort of... I don’t know, what are they doing?

 

VASTRA

Existing. As best they can.

 

CLEO

They’re not dead are they?

 

VASTRA

No, not dead. Trapped. Between two

planes of existence: the now, and the never-was. They are the lost. Not dead, yet scarcely living.

 

FX. PHONE NOTIFICATION

 

SHAWNA

Cleo. Don’t.

 

FX. CLEO PLAYS MESSAGE

 

JORDAN

(phone)

Hi Cleo. Got your message. Of course you can stay here, you can stay as long as you like. Don’t worry about rent, I’m not gonna charge my sister am I? Tell you what, pay me in chocolate biscuits.

 

Beat.

 

CLEO

That would have been 18 months ago.

(pained sigh)

... So that’s it then. My whole family,

ghosted.

(suddenly angry)

 “They are lost” - what the Hell does

that mean?

 

SHAWNA

                   Cleo-

 

VASTRA

               Your relatives have succumbed to

               the same affliction as the others.

               I am truly sorry.

 

CLEO

                    So what can we do for them?

 

VASTRA

                    Nothing. At least not yet.

 

CLEO

                    Well we can’t give up!

 

SHAWNA

                    Er, Vastra?

 

VASTRA

                    What is it?

 

SHAWNA

The ghosts. They’re not wandering around anymore. They’ve stopped.

(beat, scared)

And they’re looking up. At us.

 

VASTRA

                    Ah.

                         

SHAWNA

                    It’s like they know something’s wrong.

 

VASTRA

                    And that is a problem.

 

SHAWNA

Why?

 

VASTRA

If you were in distress, what would you do?

 

SHAWNA

I’d look for help.

 

VASTRA

Exactly.

 

FX. LOW GHOSTLY MURMURS BEGIN, GETTING CLOSER.

 

CLEO

You mean they’re coming for us?!

 

VASTRA

Is there another way out of this building?

 

CLEO

Downstairs and out the back.

 

VASTRA

Then go, now, both of you. I will catch up.

 

SHAWNA

What? We can’t leave you! That’s bad, bad karma after you saved us.

 

VASTRA

I will be unencumbered without you. My species is far more agile.

 

SHAWNA

Wait, what are you? Seriously.

 

VASTRA

I am a Silurian - and yes, I like to wear dresses.

 

CLEO

Good for you girl!

 

FX. GHOST MURMURS GETTING MUCH LOUDER IN THE STREET.

 

VASTRA

Now quickly! I will distract the ghosts and you will run like Hell is at your heels. Are we agreed?

 

CLEO

How can you distract ghosts?

 

VASTRA

Like this.

 

FX. VASTRA TAKES A RUN AND - SMASH! - DIVES THROUGH THE WINDOW.

 

CLEO

Oh well I’m not getting my deposit back.

 

Electronic music is back as they make a run for it.

 

SHAWNA

Cleo! Unlock the door!!

 

CLEO

Oh yeah.

 

FX. UNLOCKING THE DOOR FRANTICALLY.

 

CLEO (CONT'D)

Downstairs... out the back... over the wall...

FX. YANKS DOOR OPEN.

 

CLEO (CONT'D)

... and run like Hell Shawna!

 

FX. FOOTSTEPS RUNNING.

 

SCENE 6

EXT. BUSY MAIN ROAD - EVENING

A BUSY SOUTH LONDON STREET (LIKE BRIXTON ROAD). PANIC AND CHAOS. PEOPLE RUNNING AND SCREAMING.

DRIVERS ABANDONING THEIR VEHICLES AND POLICE SIRENS.

 

FX. CLEO AND SHAWNA RUN UP AND HALT IN THEIR TRACKS.

 

FX: GHOSTS APPEARING, TOUCHING  PEOPLE - WHO CRY OUT IN AGONY AND VANISH WITH A ZAPPING SOUND.

 

CLEO

Oh my god. Shawna, oh my god. Where have they come from? Why here, why now?

 

SHAWNA

The last of us will be overwhelmed - that’s what Vastra said.

 

CLEO

Oh my god, and then what?

 

SHAWNA

I don’t want to find out.

FX. A CAR SCREECHES TOWARDS THEM.

 

SHAWNA (CONT'D)

Cleo!!

 

FX. SHAWNA PULLS CLEO OUT OF THE WAY OF THE CAR, WHICH CARRIES ON AND CRASHES INTO A SHOP.

 

CLEO

Seriously, this is Mad Max stuff right here.

 

SHAWNA

Right come on, let’s make for the tube.

 

CLEO

What-? There’s no way the Hammersmith and City line is still running during a ghost invasion! It can barely handle a strong wind.

 

SHAWNA

We’re too exposed out here. If we get underground at least we can hide, we can work things out.

 

CLEO

And then what?!

 

SHAWNA

We improvise! Quick, through here!

 

FX. THEY DART DOWN A SIDE STREET AND KEEP RUNNING. SOUNDS OF CARNAGE CONTINUES DISTANTLY.

 

CLEO

Shawna! Stop

(Beat)

Abby said these ghosts were appearing everywhere, all over the country! Maybe the whole world!

 

SHAWNA

So?

CLEO

So what if... what if this is it? Like, the end? We always think there’s gonna be a next time, a later. But what if this really is it?

 

SHAWNA

I don’t know. But you’re not leaving my side for a second, you hear me?

C’mon.

 

FX. THEY TURN A CORNER - SLAP BANG INTO GHOSTS. THEY SKID TO A HALT; LOUD, GHOSTLY MURMURING.

 

CLEO

Oh come on that’s not fair!

 

SHAWNA

Back the way we came!

 

FX. THEY TURN - BUT MORE GHOSTS; CONFUSED, DISTRESSED.

 

INTENSE MUSIC SUDDENLY BEGINS AS THEY LOOK FOR A WAY OUT.

 

CLEO

We can’t! Look!

 

SHAWNA

They’re everywhere... (yells at the ghosts)

Keep back! Please! Can any of you hear me? Please just let us go! We can’t help you! We don’t know how!

 

CLEO

(yells)

We would if we could, really!

 

SHAWNA

(yells)

If you touch us, we’ll die alright!

 

FX. GHOSTS CONTINUE MOVING TOWARDS THEM.

 

CLEO

They’re not listening...

 

SHAWNA

We’re going to become like them...

 

CLEO

A living death...

 

SHAWNA

Take my hand. Close your eyes.

 

CLEO

(trying to believe)

No, no! We’re not going to die like this. Say it with me.

 

SHAWNA

(terrified) I can’t.

 

CLEO

(crying, yell)

Shawna, say it! We’re not going to die like this!

 

SHAWNA

(yell)

I wish we’d never done that bloody podcast!

 

FX: GHOSTS NEARLY UPON THEM, WHEN A COUPLE OF UNIT JEEPS SKID TO A HALT NEARBY.

 

FX: UNIT SOLDIERS JUMP OUT. CAPTAIN SPEAKS VIA MEGAPHONE.

 

CAPTAIN

(off, megaphone)

Please everyone remain calm!

 

CLEO

Shawna... Open your eyes!

 

SHAWNA

Why, what’s...?

 

CAPTAIN

(off, megaphone)

This is Captain Chopra of UNIT. I say again, this is Captain Chopra of UNIT-

 

ABBY

(off, megaphone)

Never mind you, pal. Cleo! Shawna! It’s me!

 

SHAWNA

Abby?

 

CLEO

Talk about cavalry...

 

ABBY

(off, megaphone)

We’re going to use this siren-

 

CAPTAIN

(off, megaphone)

Yes, thank you MacPhail. Squad, spread out.

 

FX. SOLDIERS FANNING OUT, UNDER.

 

CAPTAIN (CONT'D)

(off, megaphone)

You two - get down on the ground and cover your ears!

 

SHAWNA

You what?! But-

 

CLEO

Don’t argue, get down!

 

FX. A WARPED SIREN BLARES OUT

                     

CLEO

Oh my god!

 

SHAWNA

Oh my days, what is that?

 

CLEO

Racket is what it is!

 

ABBY RUNS OVER TO CLEO AND SHAWNA

                     

ABBY

Cleo! Shawna! Are yous ok?

 

SHAWNA

What’s that siren?

 

ABBY

Back at UNIT we found a frequency the ghosts seem to respond to. We don’t know why, but it seems to work. They’ll follow the truck for now.

 

CLEO

Dear God am I glad to see you. That, my girl, was timing.

 

ABBY

They’re sending everyone they’ve got.

 

SHAWNA

So this is you rescuing us, is it?

 

ABBY

Yeah. What do you reckon?

 

SHAWNA

Better late than never.

 

FX. SIREN GETTING DISTANT

 

More soothing music plays as they’re saved.

 

SHAWNA (CONT'D)

Come on. We should get to the tube station while we still can.

 

CLEO

No, we have to find Vastra. She’s the only one who has any idea what’s going on around here.

 

SHAWNA

She said she’d find us

 

ABBY

Vastra? Who’s Vastra?

 

FX. FROM A SEWER NEARBY, VASTRA’S VOICE ECHOES OUT.

 

VASTRA

(off, echo)

Come down here and find out!

 

CLEO

Vastra? ... Where are you?

 

VASTRA

(Off, echo) Beneath your feet!

 

SHAWNA

Uh... maybe she’s in the sewer?

 

CLEO

Oh you’re joking. Come on you’ve gotta be

joking.

 

FX. THE SCRAPE OF A MANHOLE COVER

 

VASTRA

Would you care to join me?

SHAWNA

Safer than being up here. If the ghosts don’t get us, Abby’s friends will probably shoot us by mistake.

 

ABBY

Shawna, do you really think -

 

CLEO

Oi! No fighting girls. (beat)

A sewer though. Come on!

 

VASTRA

(off, echoey)

I will count to ten! One, two...

 

CLEO

Alright, alright! When we’ve saved the world, I am having such a long bath.

 

Music fades into:

  

SCENE 7

INT. SEWER - EVENING

FX. A DANK, WET SEWER TUNNEL. CLEO, SHAWNA AND ABBY COMING DOWN LADDER. EVERYONE’S VOICES SOUND ECHOEY.

 

VASTRA

(echoey)

We have a long journey to make, so we will be down here for a while. A word of warning: it smells.

 

SHAWNA

(descending)

We kind of got that, thanks.

 

CLEO

Yeah, don’t want to sound ungrateful, but this is exactly as foul as I thought it’d be.

 

VASTRA

If you will need rescuing quite so often, you must accept the rough with the smooth. I see we have picked up another friend?

 

CLEO

Oh yeah sorry. Abby, meet Madame Vastra. She’s a Silurian.

 

ABBY

Oh. Er. Gosh. Hello. Does this mean...

 

SHAWNA

Yes. Episode 4.

 

ABBY

Told you.

 

Shawna chuckles.

 

VASTRA

Hello.

 

ABBY

It’s a pleasure to meet you Madame

Vastra.

 

VASTRA

Pleasure might be a stretch given the circumstances.

 

SHAWNA

Vastra, how the Hell can we beat those things up there? People are disappearing right in front of us - one touch, zap, and they’re gone.

 

VASTRA

And so the contagion is accelerated.

 

SHAWNA

Contagion? Like a virus?

 

CLEO

Oh my god, ew.

 

VASTRA

The sickness infecting our planet is indiscriminate, and the ghosts are only a symptom of it.

 

CLEO

Look, not being funny or anything, but how do you even know all this?

 

SHAWNA

Yeah, could you show your working?

 

VASTRA

I am merely repeating what my oracle tells me.

 

CLEO

Your... oracle?

 

VASTRA

A friend. Someone who has lived for millennia. An individual with extensive knowledge of both space and time.

 

CLEO

... Sorry, “space and time?” And that’s helpful, is it?

 

VASTRA

The calamity we face is not a physical one. As my oracle says, it is all a matter of time...

 

FX: SHE BEGINS TO MOVE AWAY.

 

VASTRA (CONT'D)

Follow me if you please.

 

Soft piano beigns as the girls take in this new information.

 

ABBY

I picked up a few things at UNIT. I read about Silurians.

 

VASTRA

I imagine your superiors failed to mention how they once murderered a whole colony of my people, as they lay sleeping and defenceless.

 

ABBY

(stunned)

They didn’t tell me that, no.

VASTRA

(a terrible beat)

It is a long walk. Shall we continue?

 

FX. VASTRA WALKS ON, THE OTHERS FOLLOW AT A SHORT DISTANCE.

 

SHAWNA

Nice one, Abby.

           

The piano gets louder and then quickly fades into:

 

INT. SEWER. LATER

FX. THEY WADE THROUGH THE TUNNELS

 

CLEO

So, has UNIT figured out anything else about the ghosts yet?

 

ABBY

They’re here and they can’t be destroyed. That’s about it...And every where’s getting a lot quieter.

 

CLEO

Quieter? It’s like every January sale come at once up there!

 

ABBY

Yeah London’s becoming abandoned. Like all the big cities. Manchester, Liverpool...

(catch in the throat) Glasgow... We don’t know where the people have gone. Mum and Craig are gone.

 

CLEO

Abby, those ghosts are the people.

 

ABBY

How can they be?

 

CLEO

... I heard a message, from my Mum. She said she was trapped, don’t know where.

 

ABBY

... Cleo, I’m sorry-

 

CLEO

(powering through)

What can we do about it?

 

ABBY

There’s nothing that UNIT can do, that’s for sure.

 

SHAWNA

What about your new girlfriend?

 

CLEO

Shawna...

 

ABBY

(irritated)

Osgood’s gone. It’s so weird, I can hardly remember her.

 

SHAWNA

That’s convenient -

 

ABBY

Look. I turned my back on you! I know that! Ok.

(beat, calmer) I know that.

 

CLEO

                     Abby, we don’t have time...

 

ABBY

                     No.

                     (Beat)

                     I didn’t want to be the person telling

                     the story any more. I wanted to be the

                     story. (Beat) But it wasn’t any fun without

                     you two.

 

Pause. Dripping of the sewer.

 

Consoling music plays as the girls are open with one another.

 

SHAWNA

                     You hurt me. You hurt Cleo.

 

ABBY

                     I know.

 

SHAWNA

                     And honestly I’m not sure I trust you.

 

ABBY

                     Fair. I’ll earn it back. Or at least

                     try.

 

SHAWNA

                     Cleo?

 

CLEO

                     I think you’re both idiots.

                     (BEAT)

                     But I don’t know what I’d do without

                     you.

 

VASTRA

                    (calling from a way off)

                     Any problems back there?

 

SHAWNA / ABBY/ CLEO

                    (call back)

                     No.

 

FX. AFTER A BEAT, SHAWNA WALKS ON.

 

SHAWNA

                    (walking off)

                     Come on.

 

FX. SHAWNA WALKS OFF. ABBY LEFT WITH CLEO.

 

CLEO

                    Hey, Abby?

 

ABBY

Hmm?

 

CLEO

Thanks for coming home.

 

Consoling music gets louder then fades into:

 

SCENE 8

INT. VASTRA’S DEN IN THE SEWERS 

FX. VASTRA’S MAKESHIFT HOME; A WOODEN DOOR SQUEAKS OPEN. OFF, SEWER ATMOS. THEY’VE BEEN WALKING FOR SOME TIME.

 

VASTRA

Come in, all of you.

 

SHAWNA

Where are we?

 

VASTRA

Home. Wipe your feet.

 

FX. THEY ENTER, WALKING ACROSS RAGGEDY CARPET ON STONE. OFF, FAINT SEWER ATMOS.

 

ABBY

Well... this is, er...

 

CLEO

Cosy. For, y’know. A sewer.

 

‘40s style jazz piano plays in the background, as if on a record player.

 

VASTRA

You need not spare my feelings. I used to own a house in the shadow of St Paul’s. There my late wife and I shared many years together... Your species have such short lives compared to mine.

 

A sad beat, but Vastra soldiers on.

 

VASTRA (CONT'D)

With the phenomena spreading

throughout the city, it felt prudent to relocate. There are no ‘ghosts’ in these sewers - except those I carry with me.

 

ABBY

Alright, so we’re safe down here?

 

VASTRA

Hardly that... You must be wondering what part you have to play in all this.

 

SHAWNA

Who says we have a part to play at all?

 

CLEO

Yeah, we’re just stumbling around trying to get through the week.

 

VASTRA

UNIT were sufficiently interested in you to seek your counsel. And, as it happens, so was I.

 

ABBY

Why?

 

VASTRA

I listened to your... ‘podcast’ is it? Your progress has been commendable.

 

CLEO

(joke)

Do you want to buy some merch babe?

 

ABBY

When can we meet them?

 

VASTRA

Who?

 

ABBY

Your oracle.

 

VASTRA

Immediately. I did promise you answers.

 

The record player stops.

 

FX. A CABINET OPENS.

 

VASTRA

Meet...

 

CLEO

Oh my god...

 

SHAWNA

Cleo!

 

ABBY

It’s...

 

CLEO

AN ALIEN FOETUS IN A JAR!

(Beat) Finally!

 

ALIEN

Greetings, Earthlings.

 

THE ALIEN’S VOICE TRAVELS DIRECTLY INTO OUR BRAINS.

 

SHAWNA

This has got to be a stitch-up.

 

ABBY

What - who are you?

 

ALIEN

My race communicate telepathically, as such, we have no names, only a sense of other and a sense of self.

 

ABBY

Does your race have a name?

 

ALIEN

We have no call for one.

 

VASTRA

Their species exist in the transitory spaces betwixt dimensions. I call him… ‘Floater’.

 

CLEO LAUGHS ALOUD.

 

CLEO

Are you for real?!

 

FLOATER

What amuses you, earthling?

 

Pause.

 

CLEO

Like, you know, floater? We’re in a

sewer?

 

SHAWNA

What?

           

CLEO

Just my family then, OK.

 

FLOATER

My race exists in the psychic realm: the realm of thoughts and ideas. For millennia we have watched your kind, the ways you have evolved, your rise and descent. Sometimes we cross the veil between the worlds.

 

ABBY

You can cross into our reality? Area 51, Roswell?

 

 

                              FLOATER

                     Yes.

 

                               VASTRA

                     I met one before, many centuries ago.

                     They spoke to me, told me how to sustain

                     them in the tank until they were able to

                     return.

 

                               CLEO

                          (In awe)

                     An alien foetus in a jar...

 

                               FLOATER

                     I am 6 thousand years old.

 

                               CLEO

                     Really old alien foetus in a jar...

 

                               FLOATER

                     I can survive in your world quite well,

                     but the reverse is not true. Our realm

                     will not support human life for long.

 

                               SHAWNA

                     The ghosts?

 

                               FLOATER

                     Will perish unless you find the Doctor.

 

                               ABBY

                     The Doctor? Who’s that?

 

                               CLEO

                    Ugh Abby. The Doctor? Blue Box?

                    Makeover queen?

 

                               VASTRA

                     You have heard of the Doctor many times,

                     if only you could remember.

 

                               FLOATER

                     A time-traveller stood out on the primitive

                     planet known as Earth.

                              

                               CLEO

                     (Under breath)

                     Primitive. At least we’re dressed in the

                     morning.

                              

                               FLOATER

                     Time and again they appeared. Come and go,

                     go and come again to save the day. An alien

                     to this planet in their craft, their TARDIS

 

                               CLEO

                     The blue box?

 

                         

VASTRA

                     Once a symbol of hope, it is now quite the

                     opposite. Time is out of joint. The world

                     hangs by a thread.

 

FLOATER

My race saw it all. The mistake. The Doctor’s great error.

 

ABBY

                     What did they do?

 

FX: RUMBLING, LIKE GROUND IS SHAKING.

 

SHAWNA

                     What is that?

 

CLEO

                     Earthquake in London. What the hell?

 

Solemn music faintly in the background.

 

VASTRA

Areas of London are falling into the

Redaction. Within hours, the whole city

will be lost, then the country, then the

world.

 

FLOATER

                     It’s not just here. All the peoples and

                     all the planets graced by the Doctor.

 

SHAWNA

                     What?

 

VASTRA

Were it not for the longevity of my species,

I too would have faded already.

 

ABBY

                     And you’re saying... the Doctor did this?

 

FLOATER

                     Oh yes.

 

CLEO

                    How?

 

ABBY

                    But what can we do?

 

VASTRA

Whatever their reason, and however they did it, the Doctor has unravelled reality itself. If left unchecked, their own hubris will wreak devastation on a scale never witnessed before

in the universe.

 

SHAWNA

Ri-i-ight. So where do the three of us

come in then?

                         

VASTRA

                 You? Why, you are going to stop it from

                 happening, of course.

 

SHAWNA

What?

 

CLEO

What?

 

ABBY

Hang on a minute-!

 

VASTRA

We cannot ‘hang on!’ I fear I am not   

long for this world - but you still 

have time to act!

 

FLOATER

You must locate the Doctor. They will not

be far.

 

VASTRA

The Doctor is drawn to catastrophe like a

moth to a flame.

 

SHAWNA

So what do we do when we find them?

 

 

CLEO

                   Yeah, we can’t just say “Would you mind

                   not destroying the universe?”

 

FLOATER

                   You misunderstand your mission. The  

                   Doctor is the cause of all this chaos.

 

VASTRA

                   Which means our only option is... (anguish)

                   I dare not say the words...

 

SHAWNA

                   Well someone has to. What?

 

CLEO

Yeah come on Vastra?

                         

FLOATER

                     The only remaining course of action is

                     to remove the Doctor.

 

SHAWNA

                     Remove?

 

ABBY

                     You want us to kill them?

 

VASTRA

                     We need you to kill them.

                              

CLEO

Oh, do you know what, that’s it. I’ve had enough of this. Girls, let’s bounce.

 

FX. CLEO MAKES TO LEAVE.

 

ABBY

                     (seemingly cuts her off) We can’t murder

                     someone!

 

SHAWNA

                     Vastra, you are mad if you think -

 

         

CLEO

                     Don’t feed the trolls, just leave-

 

VASTRA

My task was to find those who saw the danger, but had never met the Doctor. In short, to find you. You are the only people with a chance of carrying out this act before you disappear yourselves!

 

FLOATER

The Doctor is the black hole into which all human life is being pulled. You must find and kill the Doctor.

 

FX: EVERYONE’S VOICES BECOME GLITCHY APART FROM CLEO.

 

CLEO

                     (feeling odd) Abby...

 

ABBY

We’re not going to kill anyone no matter what they’ve done, so you’d better think of something else!

 

                               CLEO

                     Shawna, babe I’m feeling pretty weird.

 

                               SHAWNA

                     Come on Abby let’s go!

 

                               CLEO

                     Guys? What’s...

 

FX. THE WORLD IS DISAPPEARING AROUND CLEO, THE VOICES OF THE OTHERS GETTING DISTANT UNTIL NOTHING.

 

CLEO

                     Shawna - Abby! ... can you even hear me?...

 

 

VASTRA

I would not ask unless it were imperative. It grieves my soul.

 

 

                               CLEO

                     Please! Can you hear me?!

 

                               ABBY

                     But look at us! We’re not killers!

                         

CLEO

                     Stop talking! Vastra, what’s

                     happening - please!

 

SHAWNA

                     She just works for them.

 

CLEO

I need someone to hear me! Hello!

Why can’t you hear me!

 (realising)

It’s got me, hasn’t it? ...

Oh my god, it’s got me.

 

VASTRA

                     I admit it will not be easy.

                     I have seen the Doctor stand

                     alone against the armies of

                     whole galaxies and emerge

                     without a scratch.

 

 

CLEO

                     Oh God. Oh my God, Abby,

                     Shawna, don’t leave me alone.

                     I can’t be alone. Please, I

                     need you. I... I’m going...

                     I’m...

 

ABBY

                     We’re not going to do this -

                     even if we wanted to, we

                     wouldn’t know how. You need

                     another plan...

 

FX. THE WORLD WE KNEW HAS GONE. CLEO IS SURROUNDED BY NOTHING.

 

CLEO

                     I’m gone.

                               END OF EPISODE.

No music, just eerie sounds reflecting Cleo on her own in the darkness.

 

CREDITS

               Doctor Who Redacted: Episode Nine,

               by David K. Barnes.

 

CREDITS

Starring: Charlie Craggs, Lois Chimimba, Holly Quin-Ankrah, Doon Mackichan, Ambika Mod and Alasdair  Beckett-King.

           Directed and produced by Ella Watts.

Sound design by David Thomas and Arlie Adlington. Original composition by David Devereux.

A BBC Studios production.

 Eerie music fades into silence.